¦₪¦╣• Discussions..Deep Thoughts & Laughters.Only in English •╠¦₪¦

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تاريخ التسجيل : 21/11/2010
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مساهمة رقم 1

¦₪¦╣• Discussions..Deep Thoughts & Laughters.Only in English •╠¦₪¦

مُساهمة من طرف In The Zone الإثنين ديسمبر 20, 2010 11:24 pm

Discussions
Deep Thoughts&Laughters
Share some deep thoughts, jokes and riddles.x

In ONLY IN
ENGLISH we shall use English to express ourselves

exchange our ideas,
& learn from each other
we will never judge you if you make mistakes

because the only real
mistake is the one from which we learn nothing
In this space we are all
learners & we are all teachers
Hope you enjoy your time with us.x
¦₪¦╣• Discussions..Deep Thoughts & Laughters.Only in English •╠¦₪¦ 90

¦₪¦╣• Discussions..Deep Thoughts & Laughters.Only in English •╠¦₪¦ 90

إنتباه:
There have been many pictures posted with unacceptable words in the
captions, and this needs to stop.
Any word which you can not type within a reply because it is censored is
not appropriate in the captions.

This is a family oriented site, and I have friends who will let their
children watch over their shoulder while browsing, and anything you
wouldn't expose your own child, or young niece/nephew to, shouldn't be
posted.
This also goes for racial jokes, gender orientation remarks, and
all other points of the rules.

As of the time of this
posting, the following applies;

First offense will be deleted.

Second offense will incur a warning .

Third offense will incur a warning .

There won't be any
chances for any members disregarding this information a fourth time.
You will be banned!

Ignorance of this information will not be accepted as an excuse!x

Have fun, but keep it clean and family friendly!xx
¦₪¦╣• Discussions..Deep Thoughts & Laughters.Only in English •╠¦₪¦ 90

قوانين
المشاركة :

1- إلـتـزام
الأدب و إحـتـرام الـرأي و الـرأي

الآخـر .
2- تـجـنـب قـدر الإمـكـان
الـردود الـتـي
تـحـتـوي عـلى كـلمـات
الشـكـر و الـتـهـنـئـة... إلخ
3-
يـمـنـع مـنـعـا كـلـيـا كـتـابـة أي مشاركـة بـغـيـر اللغة الإنجليزية.

عدل سابقا من قبل أن تعرف أكثر في الإثنين ديسمبر 20, 2010 11:35 pm عدل 2 مرات

In The Zone

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مساهمة رقم 2

¦₪¦╣• Presidential jokes •╠¦₪¦

مُساهمة من طرف In The Zone الإثنين ديسمبر 20, 2010 11:26 pm

Presidential
jokes

A few years ago, Japanese Prime Minister Mori was given some basic English conversation
training before he visits Washington and meets president Bill Clinton.x

The instructor
told Mori Prime Minister, when you shake
hand with President Clinton, please say "how r u".x

Then Mr. Clinton should say, "I
am fine, and you?" Now, you should say "me too".x

Afterwards we translators, will do the work for
you.x

It looks quite simple, but the truth is When Mori met Clinton , he mistakenly said "Who r u?" (instead of "How r u?".)x

Mr. Clinton was a bit shocked but still managed to
react with humor : "Well, I'm Hillary's
husband, ha-ha..."Then Mori replied "me
too, ha-ha..." Then there was a long silence in the meeting
room!x

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مساهمة رقم 3

¦₪¦╣• best Punchlines •╠¦₪¦

مُساهمة من طرف In The Zone الإثنين ديسمبر 27, 2010 1:19 pm

Some good punch lines

1x.I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect, and
therefore
I'm perfect.

2. I've got to sit down and work out where I stand.

3. If I save time, when do I get it back?

4.
Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

5.
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

6. Take my advice, I don't use it anyway.

7.
The statement below is true.
The
statement above is false.

8. As I
said before, I never repeat myself.

9.
Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.

10. I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence.

There's a knob called brightness, but it doesn't work.

11. A conscience does not prevent sin. It only prevents you from
enjoying it.

12. If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.

13. War
doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left

14. Best way to prevent hangover is to stay drunk.

15. Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected become the
expected?

16. If your father is a poor man,
it is your fate but, if your father-in-law is a poor man, it's your
stupidity.

17. I was born intelligent -
education ruined me.

18. A bus station is
where a bus stops. A train station is where train

stops. On my desk, I have a,work station...What more can I say

19. If it's true that we are here to help others, then, what exactly

are the others here for?

20. Since
light travels faster than sound, people appear bright Until

you hear them speak.

21. How come
"abbreviated" is such a long word

22.
Don't frown. You never know who is falling in love with your

smile.

23. The Best of Proverbs

Should women have children after 35?
No, 35
children are enough

24. Living on Earth
may be expensive...
but it includes an
annual free trip around the Sun..

25. Your
future depends on your dreams
So go to
sleep !

26.. ALCOHOL KILLS SLOWLY So what

Who's in a hurry

27. Love is
photogenic;
it needs darkness to develop

28. Whom are you working for?
Same
people. My wife and four kids

29. A
drunk was hauled into court.
Mister,
the judge began, you've been brought here for

drinking....Great, the drunk exclaimed. When do we get started?

30. Can you do anything that other people can't?

Sure, I can read my handwriting..x

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مساهمة رقم 4

The Daily Joke

مُساهمة من طرف In The Zone السبت يناير 08, 2011 9:39 pm

The Daily
Joke

A teacher asks her
class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and
you
shoot one of them, how many will be left?"x
She calls on little TONY.x
He replies, "None,
they will all fly away with the first gunshot."x
The teacher replies,
"The correct answer is 4, but I like
your
thinking."x
Then little TONY says, "I have
a question for YOU.x
There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice
cream:x
One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice
cream.x
The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third
is
biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married?"x
The
teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, "Well, I suppose
the one
that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone."x
To which
Little TONY replied, "The correct answer is 'the one with
the
wedding ring on', but I like your thinking."x

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مساهمة رقم 5

The Daily Joke

مُساهمة من طرف In The Zone السبت يناير 08, 2011 9:42 pm

The Daily Joke
Last month, a survey was conducted by the U.N., worldwide.x
The only question asked was, "Would you please give
your most honest opinion about the solution for the food shortage in the rest of
the world?"x

The survey was a HUGE failure because

In 'Africa' people did not know what "FOOD" meant.x

In 'Western
Europe' they did not know what "SHORTAGE"
meant.x

In 'Eastern Europe' they did not know
what "OPINION" meant.x

In the 'Middle East' they did not know what "SOLUTION" meant.x

In 'South
America' they did not know what "PLEASE"
meant.x

In 'Asia' they did not know
what "HONEST" meant.x

And in the 'USA' they did not know what "THE REST
OF THE WORLD" meant!x

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مساهمة رقم 6

The Daily Joke

مُساهمة من طرف In The Zone السبت يناير 08, 2011 9:48 pm

The Daily Joke

Little Tony on a Little More
Math

Little TONY returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.x
"Why?" asks the father?x
"The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3', I said '6'", replies TONY.x
"But that's right!" says his
dad.x
"Yeah, but then she
asked me 'How much is 3x2?'"x
"What's the ******* difference?" asks the father.x
"That's what I said!".x

Little Tony on Grammar

One day,
during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show
of hands from
those who could use the word "beautiful" in the
same
sentence twice.x
First, she called on little
Suzie, who responded with, "My father
bought my
mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it."x
x"Very good, Suzie," replied the
teacher.x
She then called on little
Michael.x
x"My mommy planned a beautiful banquet
and it turned out beautifully."x
She said, "Excellent, Michael!" Then the teacher reluctantly called
on
little TONY.x
x"Last night at the dinner table, my sister told my father
that she was
pregnant, and he said 'Beautiful, just
******* beautiful!''x

Little Tony on Getting Older

Little
TONY was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after
another.
After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said,x
Son, you know
eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give
you acne, rot your
teeth, and make you fat."x
Little TONY replied, "My
grandfather lived to be 107 years old."x
The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a
time?"x
Little TONY answered, "No, he minded his
own ******* business."x

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مساهمة رقم 7

ܓ◄¦♥¦ .Some things you just can't explain--The Daily Joke

مُساهمة من طرف In The Zone الأحد يناير 09, 2011 6:48 pm

¦₪¦╣• Discussions..Deep Thoughts & Laughters.Only in English •╠¦₪¦ 2460890621_1

¦₪¦╣• Discussions..Deep Thoughts & Laughters.Only in English •╠¦₪¦ Funny_by_Mimmuski

¦₪¦╣• Discussions..Deep Thoughts & Laughters.Only in English •╠¦₪¦ For_fun_by_prosaix

¦₪¦╣• Discussions..Deep Thoughts & Laughters.Only in English •╠¦₪¦ Pound_for_fun_by_Droneguard

Animal Jokes

Some things you just can't explain

A farmer was sitting in the neighborhood bar getting drunk.i
A man came in and asked the farmer, "Hey, why are you sitting here on
this beautiful day, getting drunk?"i
The farmer shook his head and replied,"Some things you just can't explain."i

"So what happened that's so horrible?" the man asked as he sat down next to the farmer.i

"Well," the farmer said,"today I was sitting by my cow, milking her. Just as I got the
bucket full, she lifted her left leg and kicked over the
bucket."i
"Okay," said the man,"but that's not so bad."i
"Some things you just can't explain," the farmer replied.i
"So what happened then?" the man asked.i
The farmer said,"I took her left leg and
tied it to the post on the left."i
"And then?i"
"Well, I sat back down and continued to milk
her.x
Just as I
got the bucket full, she took her right leg and kicked over the bucket."i
The man laughed and said,"Again?"i
The farmer replied,"Some things you just can't explain."i
"So, what did
you do then?" the man asked.i
"I took her right leg this time and tied it
to the post on the right."i
"And then?i"

"Well, I sat back down and began milking
her again.x
Just as I got the bucket full, the stupid cow knocked over the bucket
with her tail."i
"Hmmm," the man said and nodded his head.i
"Some things you just can't explain,"
the farmer said.i
"So, what did you do?" the man asked.i
"Well," the farmer said,"I didn't have any more rope, so I
took off my belt and tied her tail to the rafter.i
In that moment, my pants
fell down and my wife walked in...i
Some things
you just can't explain."i

¦₪¦╣• Discussions..Deep Thoughts & Laughters.Only in English •╠¦₪¦ Ss-6

مواضيع مماثلة

» ¦₪¦╣• Today's English quotation ╠• English Quotation of the Day ¦₪¦
» joke:A group of frogs were traveling through the woods, and two of them fell into a deep pit...!x
» ●|▓[ English Sayings :..Say well or be still.i ]▓|●
» ╣◄ ..3..English Communication Skills.►╠
» ╣◄ ..2..English Communication Skills.►╠

جـوهـرة الـونشريس

جـوهـرة الـونشريس

جـوهـرة الـونشريس

¦₪¦╣• Discussions..Deep Thoughts & Laughters.Only in English •╠¦₪¦

¦₪¦╣• Discussions..Deep Thoughts & Laughters.Only in English •╠¦₪¦

¦₪¦╣• Presidential jokes •╠¦₪¦

¦₪¦╣• best Punchlines •╠¦₪¦

The Daily Joke

The Daily Joke

The Daily Joke

ܓ◄¦♥¦ .Some things you just can't explain--The Daily Joke

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